Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
