You don't have asthma, your pregnant
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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