Three words: puerto rican gang bang
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize