Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
