Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
So. Much. Porn.
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