Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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