its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
