Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
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