It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
