You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
