Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
