So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I would fuck him just for his dog
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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