i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
