just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
