Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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