Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
