Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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