Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
