She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
