I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
