I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
