Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
