with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize
