i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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