If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
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