I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
splinters make it hard to masturbate
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
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