garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
