I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
