There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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