There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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