He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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