According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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