U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
