Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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