I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Acid is not a monday night drug
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize