I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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