Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
