I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
