it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
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