I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
