so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
