Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
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