bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
