so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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