yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
