Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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