D3 body, D1 cock
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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