He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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