i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize