She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
