do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
