Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
